Book blogging, Discussion

[Discussion] My Fears as a Book Blogger. Do You Have These Too? What Keeps You Up At Night, As A Book Blogger?

This is going to be a quite different, emotional and possibly not very positive post, but I feel like it’s something I want to talk about.Β So this is your chance to back out! Heh. Also, you might be a little surprised that you’re not seeing a #NewBloggers 101 post on a Friday, but I’ve decided there needs to be a little change every now and then. Don’t worry, #NewBloggers will return next week!

Anyway, more about what we’ve got here today… Book blogging is mostly a positive activity, one we enjoy a lot, even if we have to really work for it. But don’t we have our book blogger fears? I wonder if yours are the same as mine? That’s why I’m sharing mine, and if you want to, you can share yours in the comments. They say, it’s better after you talk about it. Right? And we’re all in the same boat.

The Fear Of Losing The Love

This is obviously not going to be the same for everyone, because we’re at different spots as bloggers in each of our journeys. Some of you might be beginner bloggers, so you don’t actuallyΒ ‘quite have’ The Love yet, but you might be gaining it. Some of you are long time bloggers who had The Love, maybe lost it, and then got it back again. I am neither of those – I am in the middle. But that means I’ve already had some love. And I’m afraid to lose it. But what the hell am I even talking about, huh?

Well, basically… You all know that I have a few communities that I built, and while they may be settling down a little, we still know that we all like each other immensely, and those communities are definitely built on positive emotions. In the end, I really, TRULY love hanging out with you. I love cross posting, guest posting, chatting on Twitter. I love it so much when some of you say “this is one of my favorite bloggers” or “I read every post of yours”. I save those screenshots of when you say that – for a sad day (no kidding, I’ve got a folder for that.)

So what I’m afraid is… That you will stop liking me. That my posts will become boring and won’t attract attention (actually, it’s slowly happening because the #NewBloggers is ending and now it will all be slightly different). I imagine scenarios where some of my favorite people won’t feel compelled to read every post of mine. And it’s not in the numbers! It’s about specific people that I know and don’t forget to tag when I’m catching up or doing Follow Fridays or something. It’s inevitable to lose SOME love, but… I feel afraid to lose your friendship. Because it truly means a lot in my life.

The Fear of Running Out of Ideas

I’m sure you can relate. A lot of you have probably had this fear already! And I know you can always post reviews when you’re out of ideas, but that brings me to the above point – you know that not a lot of readers love reading review posts only. And we’re back to losing the love πŸ˜€

The Fear of Running Out of Energy to Blog

…Energy or time. We all know blogging is basically an unpaid job, and although it pays in emotion and books, you’re still never sure if you’ll have the energy and time for it in the long run. What if I start posting once a week and you all forget about me..? What if I don’t have time to blog hop (already happening) and reply comments (already happening!!!) What if you all think that’s cause I don’t love you???

The Fear of Losing my Hosting or the Blog Blinking Out

That’s something I never stop struggling with, especially since it’s recently happened to a close friend of mine, Jackie @ Death by Tsundoku. And it really doesn’t matter which platform, hosting service or setup you’re using – it can happen to everyone. Even free WordPress gets disabled for the stupidest reasons sometimes (I know a blogger who lost her WP blog “because she was posting links to Goodreads and Amazon, and a free blog is not supposed to be commercial”. Which is kind of killing the whole point of book blogging…?) Anyway, not to scare you, but it can happen, and I often worry about it. Do you?

The Fear of Being Hated, Judged or Blocked

I know some bloggers do get harrassed quite a lot. Thankfully, despite being someone who mingles quite a lot, I haven’t had such awful treatment as some people I know – I’ve been lucky. But I have had a few odd run-ins. Someone misreading my words and calling me out for feeling bad about the whole international bloggers thing cause I don’t know what real problems are (without giving away too much cause I don’t want to say who it was). At least they didn’t tag me to shame me, but it’s someone you all talk to and appreciate. Someone who’s never replied my comments or tweets (even before the misreading bit), and I just don’t get how other people think that person is so nice. They’ve never been nice or friendly to me. And I keep wondering, is there a reason I’m labelled as such in their eyes..? What did I do? Or is because of somethingΒ I AM?

Another time was when I was blocked on Twitter. I still don’t get why. It didn’t follow any encounter, it seemsΒ – those who know me should be able to say I’m the last person to start a fight. (Apart from the whole Internationals business and my open letter to NetGalley! But I think we were all angry at NetGalley then, weren’t we? And it’s not like it wasn’t justified. Also, it was public.) So I’ve been torn between “it was probably a misclick” and “they absolutely hate me for some reason I can’t figure out” for over a half a year. Ugh. The nastiest feeling! (Follow up: I asked them why. They said I was rude and insulting commenting on their blog. I am even more baffled. Doesn’t sound like me..? I apologized anyway. The oddest thing ever. Maybe I sleepwalked onto a keyboard or something…)

Has anything like that ever happened to you?

Fear of Misspeaking

Now, as someone who lives in a post-Soviet, historically all white (and not even English speaking) country, I encounter this problem all the time. The #diversity movement, which I love and am on the side of, can be, however, quite tough to manouver. Especially from where I was born and raised. And even more especially so, because if people see you’re white, they immediately assume you’re the same as American white, regardless of your origins and culture and the fact that actually you’re a different kind of minority too.Β For example, where I live, we just.. historically don’t have black people. Or Latino people. Like, at all. Different part of the world! They never came here.Β So it’s very hard to talk about stuff you’ve never seen or encountered. I’m always afraid I will blunder! And blunder is not taken lightly online these days – no matter what your situation. No matter that you’ve grown up in a poorer country than a lot of those minorities in America – everything is thought of only through the prism of the ‘American white’. So a lot of the time I worry about what I should say or shouldn’t say. When at the end of the day, I’m a person who just wants everyone to be equal, loved and understood.

Overall...

I think all of us feel the fear of not being accepted, not being understood. Which is why I’m glad I know I’ve got most of you as friends, some of you – as close friends, even. That some of you will always personally message me and tell me not to be stupid, or that things are okay. And that even if my blog dies (god forbid..) I still am 99% sure you won’t just forget me in a blink, I’ll be able to reach you on social media and maybe start things up again, if I wanted to. Please tell me that’s really the way it is? Because you should know I’ll be there for you!

Have you ever felt these? Or do you have any of your own? Share with me!

I’m Evelina and I try to blog about books that matter, with a bit of fun there too! Disability and equality will be topics you see a lot, but there’s also a lot of scifi, fantasy and… GIFs. I’m also the proud founder of #ARCsAnonymous.

51 thoughts on “[Discussion] My Fears as a Book Blogger. Do You Have These Too? What Keeps You Up At Night, As A Book Blogger?

  1. I have the fear of misspeaking of losing energy and the love. Because I’m always busy although I’ve tried to be active and find a community I never really fit in, my job has long days and I might be offline for a few days. So I guess I already have that fear but I’m used to that as I can be a shy person. Don’t be afraid and don’t worry, problems can be solved and sometimes fears can help you to avoid situations or they can just lie to you when everything is fine. πŸ™‚

  2. Such a powerful post!! Don’t worry we won’t forget you <3 You've helped us all so much πŸ™‚ I think you hit the nail on the head with the fears you've discussed. It's so relevant and so true. I'm afraid of not having content, being burnt out, saying the wrong thing, etc. Don't worry though! You're doing such an amazing job <3

    1. Thank you! I’m glad you liked it πŸ™‚ it was truly spoken from the heart for me. Those posts always hit a spot in people’s hearts somehow πŸ™‚
      And thank you… Really means a lot πŸ™‚ in fact, I am so glad I have these comments of yours and “an excuse” to visit you πŸ˜€ been thinking about your blog and that I haven’t visited for a while! So now I’ll be making my way to your posts πŸ˜€

  3. Lovely post Evelina! πŸ™‚ There are so many fears that I have as a blogger. But my biggest ones are losing the love and misspeaking. I love talking to all of my blogging friends and when they go away, I feel like I did something wrong. Now, I know that’s not it. As so many of us have busy lives outside of blogging, but the thought of losing that friendship is saddening. And you perfectly covered misspeaking!
    Jenn @ Bound to Writing recently posted…Review: Flow – Clare LittlemoreMy Profile

  4. Lovely and so heart-touching post evelina ❀️ You know that I can’t forget you right? I might be busy these days but trust me your’s and Marie’s blog (from Drizzle and hurricanes) are always in my mind and even if I miss on a few posts of you both, I try to open both blogs later on and read what I missed Yes, you two are like.. amazing people I found in this community and I am glad I did.

    **pardon me if there are spelling mistakes. I am typing on my phone and typing really fast because it is going to be a long comment. I hope you still understand my words

    I can relate to all your of the fears you stated. I am too afraid not-to be loved. I know I haven’t yet reached to the point where I can call myself β€œfamous” but yet I am afraid that if I decrease my posting frequency that people will start forgetting me.

    I am also afraid of being misunderstood. I try to avoid being more β€œinvolved” in online gossips and things. You know, sometimes I see people pointing something in books and then I think why I didn’t notice that? But then I thinm that’s because I don’t think everything in books as some β€œissue” or try to raise it. Because I read them for enjoyment. There are many such things that I can’t even think as problems in books, yet people point out that. This definitely makes me feel that if I would speak about those things then probably I would be attacked socially. So I guess, for me the best thing is to just mind my own business.

    Oh, and about that hosting thing, I am afraid too. You know the last time you said that my blog was not working? That was because of mybhosting issue. The RAM eas probably too low since my blog grew up so much in size. But the thing I am furied about is that, because of the same reason I upgraded my plan just last month and that issue again surfaced. I tried to talk to the hosting guys, but all they said was to once again upgrade the plan. So my whole money was wasted and I was so afraid because my blog went down everytime I hit oublish button and thus the traffic was suffering.
    I finally changed my hosting today and transferred my blog there. But yes, it cost me more money and I am so sad.
    Now I am seriously thinking of focusing in my blog so that I can make it somewhat payable? I mean atleast so that I can pay for the hosting.

    But let’s see when all this will happen, because seriously I am struggling with my time to even write blog posts these days.

    Okay, enough ranting and sorry for bothering you with all my problems But I feel that I can always rant to you somehow? So please know, that I am here for you and we relate to each other so much Lots of love!
    Sim @ Flipping Through the Pages recently posted…Flipping Thoughts: Re-reading? 5 Reasons why it’s not for meMy Profile

    1. Aww thank you! Yes, I know that it would be hard for you to forget me πŸ˜€ but it’s really nice to hear, so thank you so much for saying it πŸ™‚ <3

      Oh, I know! I don't visit Marie's blog often enough for sure - plus she's such a nice person too. I should drop by today since I'm doing a little blog hop πŸ™‚

      Don't worry about the spelling πŸ˜€ I am just happy about the awesome long comment!

      I wouldn't forget you either though πŸ™‚ although I don't visit enough (I know I don't ;_;) but I often think of your blog too πŸ™‚ and also, I think you're actually pretty popular on Instagram - so I'm sure you would still be popular there even if you suddenly were too busy to post on your blog too much (I can relate to that!)

      And yes, I agree. I sometimes raise issues, but most of the time I feel like books are for entertainment/escape/#FEELS, so I just feel the feels and don't dig too deep πŸ˜€

      Yes, about the hosting - I figured it was probably because your blog exceeded some sort of limit - because there was a similar message. Maybe you could do something to optimize the blog, like the images? Or keep the images somewhere else and just pull them from there by URL? I hope it gets solved! Blog problems are sad πŸ™ so sorry about the upgrade money though. That really sucks πŸ™

      Worst case you can always switch to free wordpress! Wouldn't look so cool, but hey, we'd still be able to follow you. Worst case scenario!

      You're not bothering me at all, I worry about your blog too! If you feel like talking to me and venting, you are always welcome πŸ™‚ I will commiserate! (I see you just said that! You are totally right - you can always rant to me πŸ™‚ I am glad you feel like it because it's exactly the kind of message I am sending out heheh :D). Anyway. Hope your blog issues are fixed soon! And that maybe you can figure out how to monetize at least a little bit πŸ™‚

      1. Yes, the blog is fine now. I have finally moved to a new hosting. Yes, it cost me some money, but the investment was worth it. Now I really feel the change. I can work faster without any issues πŸ™‚
        Monetizing is a thing I am looking forward too. I have the Amazon one, but you know how much income they made. Nill for me at the moment. Apparently, no one clicks those links. So I am thinking of other mediums. I got paid opportunities earlier but I rejected them earlier. Now I am going to consider them and will look if they are worth it πŸ™‚
        Thank you though.
        Sim @ Flipping Through the Pages recently posted…Editions Club #2 | Penguin ModernMy Profile

  5. I’ll always be about not matter what girl! πŸ™‚

    I think I have some fears like not having enough time to blog hop, as I’m pretty bad at that. I’m getting a bit better though. And also not having the energy to write. But I actually have a fear that I’m going to burnout at some point and need to take a long break cause I’m notorious for taking things to the extreme. When I set my mind to something I’ll do it, and also because I have so many ideas and posts to write I can feel overwhelmed at times knowing I have to much I want to write but then I’m not sure how to get there.

    But you’re loved! By many of us, including me πŸ™‚
    Chloe @ Book Dragons recently posted…Bookworms Explained #12: Why We have a Weird Love for StationaryMy Profile

  6. Wow, this is such an emotional post and I am really feeling for you right now. I know I’ve only recently found your blog, but I love visiting here because you write fun and thought provoking posts. I follow by email so I’d still know when to turn out, even if your posts became less frequent.
    I totally get what you’re saying about the misspeaking too. As a British woman who reads history, I know my country has screwed up or over pretty much every other country in the last 1000 years. And the current Brexit idiocy is bringing out all the folks who actually revel in our ‘glorious’ past. It’s one of the big reasons I frequently hop La Manche!
    Stephanie Jane recently posted…El Hacho by Luis CarrascoMy Profile

  7. Great post, Evelina!

    I think my “fear” is the fact that I AM America. It seems that almost everyone has a terrible perspective of Americans, and assume that all Americans have the same mentality instead of actually getting to know someone before spewing accusations at them.

    It makes me feel like I can’t say ANYTHING for fear of being taken wrong (because it WILL happen.) This is a reason why I don’t share much about my personal life because I don’t want others to take something I love and tear it to shreds.

    For me, everything you mentioned here is very relatable, and realistic.

    1. Thank you, Sheila πŸ™‚ BTW – I totally miss hanging out with you, you’ve been busy, haven’t you? So have I! But I really want to catch up with you πŸ™‚

      I think you shouldn’t worry about the American thing – we do realize it’s a huge country and every person is different πŸ™‚ at least those of us it’s worth associating with πŸ˜€

      But I think it’s not just you who can’t say something without it being taken wrong. It’s all of us xD it’s a general thing about the internet, I think. Our generation is all about taking offence and not cutting each other any slack. Sadly :/

      And I’m glad you liked the post! Thanks for visiting.

  8. aww damn… sorry you feel this way
    fear of misspeaking is real… not only on blogs/ online but even face to face. essentially people will hear most things through their own filter and I don’t think we can do much about that
    i find online harassment quite despicable. like would they say that to your face? doubt it….

    your blog is awesome, i love it and you seem like a really cool, and kind person.

  9. So first thanks for sharing your fears with us!
    Fear of losing the blog. It used to panic me in the beginning. I still fear it but I’m trying to think that if it happens I’ll build it anew.

    Fear of losing the love. Well I used to have it. A lot. But since two weeks I’ve been so exhausted that I took some distance from social media etc and the fear has losened. I just want to enjoy blogging and I won’t probably never have thousands of followers (I am not on WP.com) but if I love what i’m doing that’s the most important.

    Fear of hurting people or being bashed. Well being bashed does not frighten me as I’m strongheaded LOL Bring it on. Now it would depend of the bashing of course. Hurting people yes I don’t want to do it at all. I care about others. But I think that we can always express our honest opinion as far as we do it respectfully.

    Fear of burning out definitely!!!! I was exhausted two weeks ago. But I have a strong life instinct and I eased up on social media. Now I feel better and more energetic already.

    My biggest fear is never having physical ARCs. Because as you said being non US or non CA sucks. I even thought about changing my profile on Netgalley telling that I live in the US (I won’t do it even if I know others do it). I would so love to get these ARCs!

    Now you would not be forgotten you know!
    Sophie Eloy recently posted…Bookstagrams 101 Part 1: Why and how to begin on InstagramMy Profile

  10. These are all such valid fears. Coming up with new ideas for posts is hard. It’s the most difficult part of my week. I have to say, I don’t comment on diversity in books, because I am white, though, I am first generation American, grew up in a Caribbean neighborhood, live in a very diverse town now, and have a biracial child. There is always that worry that something written will come across wrong. When we talk, we have facials, gestures, and tone to properly convey what we are saying, and we lose all of that online. I type and re-type things and hope it doesn’t sound like an attack.
    Sam@WLABB recently posted…Reviews: The First Love EditionMy Profile

  11. Oh, Evelina…You literally describe each and every feeling and thought in my mind that I don’t have the courage to express. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts with us.

  12. This is a great post, I think I have all those fears too! and I had no idea about the amazon/goodreads thing. I would be so sad if that happened to me. Also, I would hate to be judged or hated mostly when I have unpopular opinions, I really never want to make feel anyone like I’m attacking them or something.

  13. Some of the fears I can definitely identify with. Part of the reason I got a domain, was because I was worried about being disabled on a free blog site, so I still worry about that. Don’t fear not being like though the book blogging community is a very accepting and loving place.

    1. Agreed, the free blog issue is definitely a thing, but then again, when you go self-hosted, there’s the fear of hosting problems xD
      You’re right, our community is about as friendly as it gets, thankfully πŸ™‚

  14. We all definitely have fears. I’m always afraid of ticking someone off because I am just not good at the whole being social thing. I’m a hermit by nature, though social media makes it easier for me to be more outgoing.

    I freak out whenever my hosting blips for even a few minutes.

    And OI! We’re primarily a straight reviews blog! LOL We make it work! Haha πŸ™‚
    Lilyn George recently posted…Sci-Fi Biweekly Bulletin: Rampage & The Oracle YearMy Profile

  15. I identify with so many of these! What I worry about the most is saying the wrong thing…or, from a slightly different perspective, not saying enough? There are times (as a white, American, twenty-something young woman who grew up in the middle class, so pretty *not* marginalized) I feel like not joining in a greater conversation, or at least acknowledging it, makes me a bad person? And if I’m reviewing a book with “problematic” content (one of my least favorite words on the internet!) I often pressure myself to acknowledge and discuss it, even if I read it purely for entertainment purposes, because someone reading my blog post might make incorrect assumptions about me if I don’t. A lot of this definitely stems from an attitude you mentioned above, where there’s a subset of participants in any online community that wants to treat honest misunderstandings the same way they would repeated offensive/bad behavior. Reading a lot of the comments before me though shows you have a group of friends around you who are kind, open-minded, and willing to think the best of peopleβ€”and you deserve every one of them! Thank you for opening up about your own blogging fears, Evelina β™₯ It’s always nice to find out we’re not alone (and maybe a little more worried than we need to be!)
    JJ @ This Dark Material recently posted…book review: the gold-sonMy Profile

  16. I’ve had some weird encounters. Once a blogger I liked basically told me I was a mean person because of an offhand phrase in a post where I was referring to OTHER PEOPLE’s opinions and not mine. Apparently I was responsible for people having those opinions because it’s my job to go about changing everyone else’s attitudes? Another time someone accused me (like it was a bad thing?) of being Evangelical Christian. I’m not and I don’t know why the person thought I am or why they thought that was an insult. I blocked them. First and only time. Oh, and saying that book piracy is theft and illegal is the most certain way to have angry book bloggers attack you, which is something I wouldn’t have expected from people who love books and presumably want to support authors.

    But I do live in constant fear of being mobbed by angry bloggers or having them mob my co-blogger. I’ve been blogging for seven years and the tone of the community has changed drastically. I did not initially start blogging in fear, nor would I have chosen not to publish some of my posts seven years ago because I was afraid of backlash. Blogging is a hobby and I don’t have the emotional energy to expend on defending myself from people online. I do feel that the blogging community in general is talking about certain issues and books less and writing fewer discussion posts nowadays because we’re all secretly a little afraid.

  17. I love your honesty here! In my eyes, you’re one of the more successful book bloggers (I have no idea if my idea of success is accurate or not because I’m a newbie, but you seem to be pretty busy). I wonder if with greater success comes more pressure to keep up?

    I can totally relate to your fear of being hated and also of misspeaking (they go hand in hand for me). I hate conflict and tend to self-censor myself too much in an effort to avoid it. You would think book blogging would be the most drama-free kind of blogging in the world because we’re all just talking about our own personal opinions about the books we read, but apparently not.

    I never even think about my blog going out. Maybe I should? I didn’t realize this was such an issue! I should probably figure out how to back stuff up.

    I will love you forever! You and Danielle at Books, Vertigo, and Tea were the first “big” book bloggers that were friendly to me! Several others have never even responded to my comments. I’ll always be grateful to you for making me feel welcome and heard!
    Cahleen Hudson recently posted…The week of β€œit sucks to be a woman” books and a new blogging purpose.My Profile

    1. Thank you πŸ™‚ awww, thanks! I feel like I’m not successful at all, I keep thinking of teens go got 800 follows in several months, and here I am, failing to get to 500 in almost two years πŸ˜€ pathetic! But thank you πŸ™‚ means a lot that you think of me this way!

      I think my pressure to keep up just comes with who I am πŸ˜€ I’m your typical overachiever. I scored 14 out of 10 (yes, out of TEN xD) in my maths exam in university. I did ALL the extra and extra-extra credit things that were offered xD so that’s who I am πŸ˜€

      I think book blogging is relatively drama-free, if you just know the circles you’re supposed to stay in to stay safe xD but yeah, if you hang out with the wrong kind of people, there can be loads of drama.

      Aw, thank you πŸ™‚ and Danielle is great! She’s so cool. Aw, never responded to your comments? πŸ™ dang, that’s sad. One of the biggest bloggers I know, Cait @ PaperFury is really friendly too and always visits back πŸ™‚ I’ve always thought of her as an example particularly because of this.

      And sorry I wasn’t following you on Twitter that time! Honestly. I think it didn’t notify me. I feel like half of my Twitter notifications get lost somewhere πŸ™ I do love your comments and your blog, so it was definitely never my intention to not follow back πŸ™‚

      1. OMG, please don’t worry about the Twitter thing! I barely know how to use it and neglect it terribly. I kept not wanting to tag people and talk to people on there because I didn’t want to bother them with their busy lives, and then I realized that was the whole point of Twitter. I am so clueless. I probably made it sound like I’m sitting over here quietly fuming over every person that hasn’t followed me back or responded to my comments ha ha. I honestly don’t even expect people to be able to respond to every single thing, so please never feel that pressure with me! I’m just happy I got to “meet” you!

        I’ve never really looked at Paper Fury because I don’t do YA, but maybe I should.
        Cahleen Hudson recently posted…5 quiet books that left a big impression.My Profile

  18. This is a great post. You raise all sorts of interesting and important issues. Much of what you wrote about are issues that I think about.

    I have had people that I like a lot slowly stop commenting on my blog. Since it was not sudden I assume that it was just the result of waning interest rather then offense. This is sad. I that it is a lot like real life friendships though. Sometimes they just peter out.

    I delve into controversial issues on my blog and especially on Twitter. I like civil disagreement but I deplore the nasty, personal attacks that are all over the place. On the Blog, I get a fair amount of disagreement and discussion in my comments section. With a couple of minor exceptions my comments section generates really good discussion and civil disagreement between folks with very different belief systems.

    Twitter is a different story. There is so much nastiness coming from all sides. I am mostly liberal, Peo women’s rights, anti – racist. However, I disagree with some things comping out of the left. There is so much stridency and intolerance, once again from both sides. Lately I have been concerned that the left has gotten so bad. I have had people that I have interacted with for years block me over minor disagreements. There are now social media mobs jumping all over people, once again it comes from both sides. Many people are expressing fear of speaking out on certain issues. I have had enraged people on both sides of issues hurling insults at me.

    I have found that it is best to speak one’s mind after careful consideration of ethics and logic. It is important to listen to others and try to understand them. It is important to always be polite, friendly and engage in disagreement in good faith and an open mind. With that, if one censors oneself because someone might disagree, or just say that they are offended, one will live in a repressed echo chamber. I find that in the end, most people are civil and can handle disagree just fine.
    Brian Joseph recently posted…Evelina by Francis BurneyMy Profile

  19. I RELATE SO HARD TO UM…LIKE ALL OF THESE?! MIND READER. I absolutely live in dread of offending and hurting people, and I mean that so deeply. And I’m blocked by an absolute ton of people on twitter because a few years ago people started hate threads on me and I just??? It still makes me really upset because I hate confrontation and I hate misunderstandings and blunders! I also wish the blogosphere was more forgiving?! I saw an author mess up on twitter the other day and she STILL got so many hate threads, even though she apologised! I don’t think we’re being fair if we have 0% interest in giving out forgiveness?! Hmm.

    I also always am worried people will end up hating my blog. I’m sure that’s our self-sabotaging artist self’s speaking but it’s hard right?! Every time my blog stats drop I’m like: OH WOW THIS IS THE END. I AM NO LONGER INTERESTING.

    Ah insecurities are so fun. (NOT sobsob) But at least probably most of us feel this way right?! And hopefully a lot of them will neeeever happen. *sends you comforting cake*
    Cait @ Paper Fury recently posted…10 Reasons I Love Books About Siblings (Fictional Siblings Are Better Than Real Ones? Y/Y?)My Profile

  20. Goodness me, I link a lot to Goodreads and Abebooks (of which I am an affiliate) but I pay for my blog, but still it’s a little worrisome. I also have of fear of saying things that others may be offended by or misconstrue, and of being hated and trolled for kicks.
    In the end, I remind myself that I’m blogging mainly for me, and if people dig what I post then it’s all good. I’m not out there to offend people in anyway cuz’ I consider myself a silly goober who reads what she wants and likes to jabber on about bookish delights online to anyone who’ll listen.
    Miggs recently posted…The Roundup: Books Read in March 2018My Profile

  21. My fears are as follows:

    – Fear of giving up the blog
    – Fear of feeling posting is a chore and I’ll stop posting.

    Those are really my two fears. πŸ™‚ I kind of got over the second one by telling myself this is something to be enjoyed however it’s easier said than done.
    Karoline recently posted…Book Blogger Hop 4/13My Profile

  22. yep .. I mostly get all thoses fear aswell.. but I didn’t knew about that losing hosting thing, even on free WP !! Damn.. im kinda scared now.. o-o

    But my most feared one gotta be running out of ideas… what do you do in that instance ?!

  23. These are all pretty legit fears. I have been blogging for a while now, and I’ve had moments where it seems like a chore instead of fun. However, it’s usually when it come to sitting down and typing up all my posts. I love the reading and sharing my thoughts part. As well as chatting with other bloggers and readers. It just takes FOREVER to write a post. LoL
    As for angering people or being judged, I think I fly so far under the radar that no one notices me. I just sort of do my own thing and am a bit of a hermit (even online). I more or less have an issue of people going, “Who’s Book Sniffers Anonymous?”
    Kristin (Book Sniffers Anonymous) recently posted…Review: For Crosby by J. NathanMy Profile

  24. Aawwww come here and let me give you a hug (I’m serious. You want sunshine and beach life? You have my invitation to come and have a vacation in the Philippines).

    Valid fears my friends. My main fear is losing my blog because of something that Google might not approve of (I use blogspot) and I won’t be able to get back all that I’ve written and worked hard for. It’s the same fear that drives me not to move over to WordPress because I feel I’ll lose all the files etc.

    Right now I’m still in the verge of wanting to change my blog name. It’s scary because People might not recognize me and my blog any more.

    1. Aw, thank you πŸ™‚ that is so sweet!
      Yeah, that’s also a valid fear – I guess if you’re self-hosted, you will worry about the host, and if you’re hosted by Blogger or WordPress, you will worry about their judgement. I guess there’s always something to worry about xD
      As for the rebranding – I’m glad you finally decided πŸ™‚ it’s always better to rebrand sooner than later – because your blog continues growing, and the later you try to move, the harder it would be πŸ™‚

  25. Bravo for another awesome discussion. I know how hard it must be to air your fears to us. I have many of the same ones. I gave up doing discussion posts because not too many people commented on them. I’m thinking I gave up too soon though, and plan to try again. And I lost my free WordPress because of sharing links. I was allowed to export my data and then went to self hosting so that will never happen again. Your posts are always entertaining and you put a little bit of yourself into all of them. I sure do enjoy visiting and chatting!
    Laura Thomas recently posted…Saturday Screams #51 ~ It’s all about the BOO plus a really huge shark!My Profile

  26. First off, I just want to applaud you on having the courage to post this!

    Since I’m a small blogger as of now I don’t have to deal with the fear of losing love but I definitely have the fear of losing ideas, and even greater, fear of accidentally stealing another bloggers’ ideas! It’s a constant struggle and I try to look for inspiration from everywhere but blogs because of my fierce paranoia. I totally get the fear of running out of time or energy to blog too! I’m in my final year of highschool which is said to be a very hectic and difficult period and it’s a huge struggle to find the energy to write at times. I often find myself wondering if I’ll have to give up blogging due to studies, something I am desperate to avoid.

    And lastly, you’re never going to lose all that blogger love from me at least even if you disappear for a year because I’m just going to give you a huge virtual hug and squeal in delight. Your posts are the best and it’s okay if you don’t get time to comment back, most of us get it. We love you for everything you do and the efforts you put in, no matter the outcomes. Don’t worry about the New Bloggers series ending, it was great while it lasted but change is good. Just remember, I’ll always love you loads πŸ˜€
    Charvi recently posted…Bookish Academy Awards TagMy Profile

    1. Thank you πŸ™‚ yes, this wasn’t an easy post, but I feel better after sharing all this.

      Well, you can prevent losing ideas by always writing them down πŸ˜€ I have a notebook app on my phone for that xD as for stealing ideas – even if accidentally – I know what you mean! It can happen, and I think it’s unavoidable – there are so many of us, ideas are bound to repeat sooner or later! I don’t think it’s such a bad thing either – just think of it as “your take” and “someone else’s take” on the same thing, if this happens πŸ™‚

      Awwww thank you! That’s such a sweet thing to say πŸ™‚ means a lot, thank you!

  27. Thank you for taking the time to write this personal post
    I can definitely relate to a lot of them! With so many things currently on my plate I worry a lot about losing the enegery to blog and keep up with everything, because there is so much else that I have to do :/ And I’m always afraid of misspeaking and ending up upsetting other readers.

    1. And thank you for reading πŸ™‚ oh yes, agreed – the energy to blog is one of the most important things. And it seems like a lot of us worry about misspeaking! Well, at least we are not alone πŸ™‚

  28. Yeah, the misspeaking thing is definitely something I think about. I got called out on Twitter a long time ago, when I answered and LGBT tweet with ‘love is love’. The person told me that was really condescending, because not everyone was looking for love. Or even sex. And I felt like I had been slapped – really slapped – because I just tried to participate in spreading positivity.
    And of course, I think that in many European countries, the way race is viewed is very different from how it’s viewed in the US. Which means that our perspective is definitely not the same. And being white and stating things like that can be fighting words on the internet these days.
    And I will always love you! No matter if you blog or not! I think that once we make friends with other bloggers, we’ll stay friends, even if blogging isn’t a part of the equation anymore.
    {{{hugs}}}
    Lexxie @ (un)Conventional Bookviews recently posted…Weekend Wrap-up #233 – Spring Has Spr… *atchoo* … ung!My Profile

  29. The fear of misspeaking is a huge one for me, so I want to thank you for touching on that <3 I am what most would call "American White" and therefore often find that my thoughts and appreciation of diverse titles have been turned away. But I am also bisexual and have a daughter who is Latinx and have my own history. Don't we all? I never try to compare my own life to another's but I wish it were not so hard to lend my thoughts or voice. I want her to never fear this.

    The rest of this post I relate to as well, but I that part truly spoke to me – xx
    Danielle recently posted…Sunday Sum~UpMy Profile

    1. I feel like a lot of us have this fear, cause bloggers just keep saying this in comments πŸ™‚

      Oh, I didn’t know you were bi πŸ™‚ find out something about your friends every day πŸ™‚ yes, well, I can understand about being white… Personally, I think this whole “not diverse enough to have an opinion” thing is just BS, because so what if they’re trying to mute the bigger part of society that has been bigoted in the past – it’s still muting, and muting doesn’t lead to anything good. All it can lead to is the reversal of roles of opressed and oppressor, in the case of success – and not equality. And that is no success!

      1. Exactly! Problems are not solved by creating more problems. And not everything should be taken at face value. My daughter looks whiter than I, and she most certainly is not πŸ˜‰ For myself, diversity should be all-encompassing and about equality. We cannot have that and preach it if we are still muting and isolating one another <3
        Danielle recently posted…You Choose, I Read!My Profile

  30. Unfortunately, people tend to forget that Tweets don’t show body language or emotions and waaay to often comments are misunderstood. The reader adds their own emotions, thoughts etc to the text of the Tweet and misunderstands arise. What baffles me is how quickly people turn to hate or rudeness. We have become a very judgy society. Despite declaring we want equal rights for all and everyone is entitled to their opinions, the results are more often my view or the highway. I think we all have these fears but as you mature (or get old as @uck) you begin to realize not everyone will be a part of your circle. Some will leave you, others you will leave, but if you stay true to yourself you will succeed. I think we all dread waking up and finding our blog or followers gone. For the longest time, I was afraid to take a day off from commenting and replying back. I am also careful when commenting on what I dub “drama moments” on Twitter or really thinking before I express opinions on any platform. Wonderful post. I think a lot of people can relate and understand what you go through at times.
    Kimberly @ Caffeinated Reviewer recently posted…Sunday Post #313 Longest Week Ever!My Profile

  31. I’ve actually had times where I didn’t want to blog and I also ran out of ideas. I think it’s just a cycle and I usually just unplug for a few days and I usually get my mojo back! πŸ™‚

    I also had my blog hacked so I feel your pain. It took a while to fix but it’s fixed now πŸ™‚ I have learned that it’s not the end of the world. I have also learned that blogging does have it’s bad days and good days.. I’ve actually been blogging for over 10 years now, with a few hiatuses over the years, and multiple blogs… LOL and I still find that I love blogging. But I also don’t stress out too much.
    Zeee @ I Heart Romance & YA recently posted…Smart, Sexy & Steamy! Withholding Nothing by Victoria Bright [ARC Review]My Profile

    1. Awwwww ;_; THANK YOUUUU!! <3
      I am very happy to have you as a friend. And also incredibly proud to have a mermaid-haired person in my friends πŸ˜€ (haha!) (no but seriously. I constantly envy the hair, in a good way :D)

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